Emotional abuse is a regular pattern of threat, constant criticism, and manipulation to control and suppress the other person. It doesn’t always lead to physical abuse but equally harmful as Physical Abuse. It is extremely damaging to your self-esteem and confidence. Any relationship can be emotionally abusive like parent-child, siblings, friendship, intimate relationship (boyfriend-girlfriend) and husband-wife relationship. The most common emotionally abusive relationship is of husband and wife.

Sometimes for years, victim person doesn’t see ill-treatment as abuse. Victim person lives in denial to deal with stress and this cause individual further severe Emotional Trauma, Depression, Anxiety and Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. Abusive People have their own set of insecurities n they don’t know how to have positive healthy relationships. They mostly feel hurt, anger and powerless. Most abusers are suffering from different personality disorders like Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and Antisocial Personality Disorder and so on. If you face few of following behaviours, you need professional help and it’s a possibility of an emotionally abusive relationship:

  • The person feels extreme possessiveness or constant jealousy. He/she would like to control all aspects of your life and through threats or violence try to assert dominance over you. Small arguments tend to escalate physical abuse between both of you over the day to day conversations and due to their manipulation tactics you start justifying the abuse and start believing you’re the problem.
  • In the initial of relationship, a person keeps pressurizing for immediate commitment. Person demeans you, your achievements, your hopes and dreams. The person makes you feel that you are always wrong and whatever decisions you made are wrong. Whatever you do, it’s never enough and right for the person. They neglect you to punish you and may have unrealistic expectations.
  • It’s good if a couple spends quality time together but the problem starts when the person (your spouse) isolates you from family and friends. Even person had a problem with whatever you do with your spare time or to make yourself happy like exercise, car, phone, Family, Friends etc.
  • The person won’t accept own faults and blames you or others. They play the victim and blame you for everything like their problems, failures and unhappiness. They always point out faults in you and your weaknesses. They rarely say sorry.
  • The person mostly disregards your opinion, needs and ideas and always expects you to serve and obey. They may try to control you and want you to take permission to make decisions or go out somewhere. They may try to manage the finances like how you spend money.
  • The person keeps criticizing you and use vulnerable points about your past and makes you feel bad about yourself. They may humiliate you n put you down. They may call you names or bully you and make fun of you in front of others. They may use negative remarks to frighten you but won’t take others laughing at them.
  • The person may have sudden mood swings. They may not show empathy and mostly emotionally unavailable. They don’t care about your feelings. They may deny their behaviour whenever confronted.
  • A person is never happy whatever you do and you go out of the way to make the person happy. To keep the peace in the relationship, you may stay silent, whenever you are angry.
  • A person is cruel to others especially children and animals and may have a history of hitting in the past. Person manipulates you in unwanted sex or may deny for sex to manipulate and control you.

If you are facing such issues, first thing is verbal abuse is a choice and you have to accept that it’s happening with you. You have to identify the patterns of controlling behaviour abuser use and accept the responsibility of your behaviour and start taking steps how to overcome it and finally approach us for professional help.