Everyone has problems. No life is trouble-free. In fact, one of the biggest truth is that life is full of problems.
How NOT to solve a problem
Some unhealthy ways to deal with problems is:
Procrastinating: Telling ourselves that we shall deal with the problem later. This kind of person hopes that the problem will go away on its own. Usually, if the problem is not addressed soon, it gets bigger and more complicated.
Blaming: We blame others for causing the problem. Maybe it’s true. The thinking may be that since the problem is created by someone else, that person should resolve the issue. However, the problem persists and needs to be handled by us.
Denying: Some people totally deny that there is a problem. This is the case, for instance, with addiction. The addict or alcoholic totally denies that he has a problem. Therefore, no need to a get a solution.
First step is acceptance
The first step in resolving any problem is to accept that there is a problem. See the issue in totality – how big is the problem? What damages is it causing or likely to cause in the future? What are the various ways we can deal with it? What is the cost of the solution, in terms of time, money and energy?
After we accept that we do have a problem, take the next important step – get help.
Seeking help is one of the most effective ways in dealing with any issue. The advantages are:
- We get another perspective of the issue which may clarify the real contours of the problem at hand
- Two hands are stronger than one. If we involved another person, our efforts are doubled
- The other person may be better equipped to deal with the issue. For instance, a professional plumber may do a better job that DIY effort. This is especially true for emotional or social problems.
- We lessen our burden. We can share the work.
Help in our personal lives
When it comes to problems in areas of our personal lives, we may hesitate in seeking help.
We may be having problems with our spouse or children. A loved one may be addicted to alcohol or drugs. We may feel down in dumps.
In such situations, it is imperative we seek appropriate help of a professional. We may try and fix the problem ourselves, but it usually fails.
We may hesitate due to the stigma attached in going to a psychiatrist, counsellor or rehab, but we must remember it is our life and we must do all that is needed to get back on track.
When in trouble – get help!