Since she gave birth, my wife has had no sex drive whatsoever. Despite many arguments between us, nothing has been resolved. So we can go on for months at a time with no sex! I have tried everything I can think of. Whenever I talk about the subject she ignores me. Eventually when I get some answers she says she is tired or too busy looking after our son or working on the house duties. I’m finding myself getting very stressed over the matter and feel my anger rising about the whole situation, please help.
Answer: Wife sounds worn out and depressed to me and I think she ought to see a lady doctor about this. I do hope you can encourage her to get help as she obviously feels pretty awful. I realise this is awful for you too, but do try and be patient. You have made a child together and I'm sure you want to hang on in there, if at all possible, and bring up this little boy between you.What may help a little is if you – difficult though it is – back off a bit regarding sex and simply try to re-engage with her romantically. Can you organise someone to babysitter and take her out for a meal at least once a week? You are a short fuse and she is depressed. The result is a kind of stalemate.
From her point of view she may well feel that you are too grumpy and she can’t see why on earth she would want to have sex with you because the atmosphere is no longer very loving. You on the other hand probably feel that you would act in a more loving way if you were getting more sex. But you could start right away by trying to somehow recapture how things were before the baby was born.. It's not very hard to recreate that magic before ur baby was born, simple physical hugs) holding hands complementing her, sending her appreciative text messages, sending her some flowers to show how much you appreciate hear role as-mother. Get out for a weekend without your child and indulge in a lot of slow fore playing, engage in conversations with her, as women are more emotional and want that connect. Sending her flirtatious messages saying how much more you desire her. Try to get out on some weekend where you can tell your in laws or your parents to look after your son while you express your emotional and physical bond. Reassure her that you love her and also, want a bit of her attention to strengthen your bond as partners and parents.
With the above pointers certainly there is bound to be some improvement and the channel of communication will be more warm and fluid. If you encounter further issues you can always seek help of a sexologist.