Healing Isn’t About Forgetting—It’s About Rising Stronger-
By Ms. Hemma D’SouzaFounder & Director - Counselling Psychologist, Cognitive Behavioural & Neuro-linguistic Therapist, Life Coach, and Mental Health Writer at Hilcy Wellness
Healing is not about erasing the past or waiting for an apology that may or may not come. It’s about reclaiming your power, finding peace within yourself, and choosing to grow despite the pain.You don’t heal to get over them—you heal to free yourself. You heal so that what once broke you no longer controls you.Healing is not easy, but it is possible. And most importantly, it is worth it.How to Begin Your Healing JourneyAccept What You Cannot ChangeThe past cannot be rewritten, but your future is still yours to shape. Instead of asking Why did this happen to me?, ask What can I learn from this? Acceptance is not approval—it’s choosing to no longer let the pain define you.Stop Waiting for an ApologySome people will never acknowledge the pain they caused. That’s their burden, not yours. True healing happens when you stop seeking closure from others and start creating it within yourself.Protect Your Peace with BoundariesHealing requires you to stop allowing what hurt you to keep hurting you. That means setting boundaries, walking away from toxic situations, and prioritizing your well-being. You owe yourself that protection.Shift from Pain to PowerEvery struggle holds a lesson. Instead of letting pain keep you stuck, use it to build a stronger, wiser version of yourself. Growth comes from what you choose to do with your experiences.Be Patient with YourselfHealing isn’t a straight path. Some days, you’ll feel strong. Other days, the past will resurface. That’s okay. Progress isn’t about never feeling pain again—it’s about handling it with resilience and self-compassion.
What Psychology Says About Healing
Dr. Nicole LePera: “Healing happens when we take responsibility for our own emotional state, rather than expecting others to fix or acknowledge the pain they caused.”
•Brené Brown: “You either walk inside your story and own it, or you stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness.”
•Carl Jung: “I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become.”
These words remind us that healing is not about them—it’s about you. It’s about reclaiming your story and deciding how it shapes you moving forward.
The Truth About HealingYou don’t need their apology. You don’t need an explanation.You need you—choosing yourself, protecting your peace, and stepping into your future on your own terms.
Studies show that setbacks are normal. Healing happens in waves, with ups and downs, but progress is still being made.Healing isn’t about forgetting. It’s about rising stronger than ever before.