As a Counselling Psychologist, I have interacted and counselled many couples age ranging from 25 to 60 on Post Marital issues. While many had courage to realize and felt need for correction thru professional counselling, many must have suffocated and continued to contain issues within. As per my experience, there can be 100 reasons for conflicts and every case may be unique, with different reason(s). I have compiled few most important issues being faced by young couples, I am sure this will be helpful to couples to identify, understand and work upon for ensuring better management of married life.
Issues:
1. Communication issues: Poor communication, absence of open-minded discussions leading to piling of unresolved conflicts.
2. Expectation mismatch: Unmet expectations from each other, leading to disappointment and frustration.
3. Financial stress: Differences in spending habits and individual financial priorities.
4. Lack of intimacy: Emotional or physical disconnect, leading to feelings of isolation.
5. Infidelity (EMA - Extra Marital Affair): Betrayal of trust, causing hurt and anger.
6. Parenting disagreements (in case of children): Different parenting styles, discipline, and co-parenting challenges.
7. In-laws interference: Overinvolvement or meddling by extended family members. At times also undesired and excess social / official /religious interference.
8. Personal health & addiction issues: Unresolved personal health issues such as depression, anxiety, or addiction.
9. Changing values and goals: Shifts in individual priorities, values, and life goals. This applies mostly to working couples and that too in different hierarchy – imbalance of individual income.
10. Lack of trust and respect: Eroding trust, respect, and admiration for each other.
11. Unrealistic expectations: Expecting perfection or trying to change each other.
12. Personal growth and identity: Individual growth and identity changes, leading to disconnection.
13. Excessive screen time, overindulgence with social media and unsolicited contacts.
14. Modern times, post marital dating apps soliciting undesired association and personal intimacy.
Remember, every situation is unique, and often it's a combination of factors that contributes to post-marital problems. With openminded discussion, behavior flexibility and understanding, addressing these issues can help couples to work towards resolution and strengthening their relationship.
Dr. Dharmendra Solanki (PhD.)
Counselling Psychologist & Life Coach.
Mumbai + Global (online)What’s app: +91 9819724462