Hello thanks for your approach, It's goodthing you are willing to takehelp. Dealing with marital life isn't easy.Difference of opinions, thoughts, likes and dislikes etc. People will be in the mode of showing the fingers who did wrong, rather finding the solution is main thing.
Scared of losing the relationship or other insecurities could also disturb the relationship or self well being.
Working on thought process, if possible try to speak with your partner about your emotions. It wouldn't be easy to guide you all in this platform. However you can visit psychologist in your place.
Next Steps
you try to take a help from psychologist to cope with your situation. take care.