Wrong Thinking problem (please help)

I am suffering from depression since 5-6 years. I have sometimes started taking medicine and sometimes I have stopped taking it I am quite good at computer programming, I am from a Tier 3 college, that is why I was not able to understand which technology I should study so that I can get a job. I decided to prepare for "Java Developer". Later I came to know that it is very difficult for a fresher to get a job. One day I was talking to one of my classmate she told me that she has a job as "Laravel Developer" in Noida. Hearing this, my hope will go and I thought, I will also start from here. Then I started studying for Laravel developer. I started having headaches and a lot of anxiety. Because in my mind I feel that my classmate has contributed to my life, and I do not want to take her contribution, My parents keep asking me why are you pursuing your career in IT. And I just told lie to my parents that I can't get a job yet... I am very worried please help😭😭😭🙏