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Sexual Orientation issues.
Recently had the cousin undergoing psychotherapy for trauma and orientation issues. Was not able to cope up with the incident and events happened. He had event of same sex experience 8 yrs back . And could not process the experience. He was under constant guilt. He doesnt identify with the label and considers himself to be a straight person . How can he identify himself with it.
Answers (17)
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Hi, Consult a psychologist
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Allow the person to confide in himself.processing can take time .as far as identity goes one cannot identify themselfes with only one experience.take Therapy for tauma n councilling therapy.Dbt therapy is best in this case.
Next Steps
dbt therapy
Health Tips
connect with psychotherapist
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As a counseling psychologist, I would emphasize that a single past experience does not define one's identity or sexual orientation. It’s important to separate behavior from identity—many people have experiences that don’t align with their current orientation or self-perception, and that’s okay. Helping him process this experience without judgment is key. Therapy should focus on reducing guilt and shame, addressing trauma, and promoting self-acceptance. He doesn’t need to label himself based on one incident; instead, he should reflect on his consistent attractions and desires over time. Understanding and accepting himself without pressure is crucial for healing and clarity.
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Seek help and support (Counselling)
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Therapy should help him to develop clarity and peace regarding his identity. It’s important to know that identity exploration is a personal journey, and there is no rush to come to conclusions.
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continue his therapy session
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Hi,
Motivate and encourage the person and help them identify sources of support, from family, friends, socially and other resources, slowly this may help a person to overcome and build themselves and to resolve internal thought or conflicts.
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seek the professional guidance
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It happens. This state of confusion needs it's clear path way to heal. It is better to start counseling and take professional help.
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Take professional Services
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Start counseling
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See, firstly, it’s not a race of identification. It’s certainly it can feel that you know you are confused and you can’t relate to things around, but it takes time. It takes patience. It takes guidance and when in doubt you should continue psychotherapy, you should talk to your therapist more and more and more about the issues about what’s going on in the mind and how does impacting your feelings and your actions and I am here to talk about it. Your friend can feel free to reach out and tell me what exactly he thinking what exactly is bothering him, and we can decide on how he can get better all the best.
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Hi
1. Express guilt feelings directly or passively
2. Is guilt justified
3 should vs actual doing/actual control
4 forgive
5 freedom sense for identity
6 increase socialization
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dbt therapy
Health Tips
freedom
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There are a lot of reasons behind one-off sexual same-sex engagements. It should be understood that one does not have to start “identifying” with a gender identity because of them. Guilt, on the other hand, is quite an intense emotion. Visit a counsellor and identify the cause of this guilt to resolve it.
Next Steps
Visit a counselor
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Track at what instances the guilt might be affecting you. Healing starts there. Visit a counsellor.
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Dr. Padam Kanwar Bhati (PhD)
Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
Yes truly, bothering this thought , But still therapy should be started so he himself get clarity, now a days many are very open and visiting to Psychologist / therapist .
He required lot validation which should go under supervision
Next Steps
Book a appointment
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Meet psychologist
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Ms. Hema Sampath
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
Would sugfest your cousin to either continue the therapy with the same person or with somebody else to understand himself better and to get a clarity..
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Dr. Kavita Bhutani (PhD)
Psychologist
7 yrs exp
Gurgaon
Areeee why can’t face
It’s your life you are entitled to put yourself first
When u are crying who is there with you
You yourself
So let yourself feel happy with whatever makes you happy unless you are harming anyone else
Smile more
Tell him to talk to me or whoever he feels is his safe space
Connect with nature
Ice therapy
And tell him u will love him anyway
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Ms. Rizwana Parvin T M
Counselling Psychologist
7 yrs exp
Coimbatore
First he has to accept the crisis he is facing, and slowly overcome by gaining strength and be clear about his identity for which he may have to go through a couple of counselling sessions.
Next Steps
Talk to a psychologist.
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Ms. Smriti
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
Encouraging the person to be patient with themselves as they explore their feelings. It's possible to have certain experiences without it defining one's overall orientation.
Next Steps
starting with a therapist who specializes in trauma, sexual orientation, or identity can help them unpack the emotions tied to the event.
Health Tips
consult
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Dr. Rajni Khantwal Pant
Ayurveda
31 yrs exp
Delhi
Sexuality does not define anyone. It's one just part . There is much more to one's personality. Be comfortable in what you feel. Self acceptance is most important. Find out your other interests . Seek help of a professional. He / she will help you discover your real self. And move forward in life
Next Steps
seek counseling
Health Tips
Don't succumb to nagging thoughts. eat , sleep well.work out and be healthy and happy in your own skin
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Ms. Pooja Gupta
Counselling Psychologist
8 yrs exp
Delhi
Hi
It's common for individuals to grapple with their identity, especially after significant events that challenge their understanding of themselves. For your cousin, the key lies in recognizing that sexual orientation is not strictly binary and can be fluid. He might benefit from exploring his feelings and experiences without the pressure of having to label himself definitively. Engaging with a knowledgeable therapist can provide a safe space to process his trauma and help him unpack his emotions related to the same-sex experience. Encouraging self-reflection, journaling, or joining support groups can also assist him in understanding that the complexity of human sexuality allows for a variety of experiences without the necessity of strict labeling. Ultimately, it's about finding a sense of comfort in his own skin and acknowledging that itâs okay to feel conflicted, as this is a part of the journey toward self-acceptance.
Next Steps
consult with a Psychologist
Health Tips
seek help
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Ms. Sneha Shinde
Counselling Psychologist
15 yrs exp
Mumbai
Hi, right now we should be thankful that we are in the era where parents are giving this freedom to express their sexuality, to their kids. The taboo is not high as it used to be and friends & family are also supporting. It’s a matter of one’s own choice & decision. Once ur cousin has the confidence to accept his orientation & sexuality, he can move ahead.
To come to this stage he can go to a Psychologist for gaining confidence & therapy, counselling for coming out of the past trauma & guilt. Rigorous counselling & Psychotherapy is needed. This will also reduce the anxiety he must be facing. He can go for virtual sessions also . I can guide.
Next Steps
Counselling & Psychotherapy adviced.
Health Tips
Remember sexuality does not define you.
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