Mood swings. Why is this happening?

Hello. Thank you for writing your situation in such detail. I appreciate you for being so open about your thoughts and feelings. Your challenges are far too many to be discussed in a single answer here. But let's try to organize all problems so that we can move ahead step by step. First of all, the thought that "I am unable to make decisions of any kind" is simply not a fact. It may appear to you that way because you are probably hesitating to take a decision thinking about the possibility of failure. The fear of failure is the biggest factor in not sticking with a decision. I am sure you have all the positive thoughts when you take on a project or a career opportunity. But the fear of "not being successful" holds you back. You may also have put conditions on your self worth. What does it mean to put conditions of self worth? It simply means some conditions must be satisfied for you to think "I am capable / deserving / worthy". And you have probably decided in your mind that, if those conditions are not fulfilled, it'll mean you are not good enough/worthy/deserving and capable. This thinking needs to change. As long as you have these conditions for self worth, you will always be worried whether you will succeed or not. Thus, it is vital that you decide in your mind, once and for all, that you are a human being capable of having dreams and working hard to make them come true. And if something doesn't work out, you always troubleshoot, take help, learn more and move ahead no matter what! In stead of telling yourself "I am not capable of doing anything worthwhile" you have to start telling yourself "I am not going to judge myself based on any external results, I am going to take decisions and stick with them for longer periods of time, I am going to work hard and trust my decisions. And I am willing to face some temporary failures, for the ultimate success. And I am willing to invest a few years before I start seeing results." You are also experiencing a phase of depression. Depression can lead to a lot of negative self talk. The best course of action you can start taking right now is, stop entertaining the negative, self criticizing, self downing thoughts. Do not let those thoughts run your day. You may note down the negative thoughts, and keep that paper aside. Acknowledge the thoughts, but don't act on them. These thoughts will fade away as you start trusting yourself more and more. About career choice, you can safely say there's an expiry date on how much we can blame our parents for choosing the career for us. It really doesn't help you constantly thinking about how your life could have been better if you had chosen some other career.

Small steps. Start taking your decisions with more trust in yourself. Leave aside doubt or thoughts such as "will I succeed". Decide what your goal is, chalk out the action steps, and just start with the smallest step first. Inch by inch, everything is a cinch! The beauty of this approach is that, the more baby steps you take, the more you start trusting yourself and higher the confidence. Hope this helps I wish you all the best. .