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Very afraid to go social,changing mind
I have been facing a constant problem in focusing on anythingsince 12 th . I never had much friends nor was very comfortable in public .i am very afraid to go out of home .i get irritated very easily no fixed decision .very big fear of being criticized and letting down parents. I am very comfortable when i am alone but in public i feel like just running away .i have twitchings blushing anf get very uncomfortable but try to show i am normal. When i am alone i am comfortable.i am constantly having sucidal thoughts and sometimes i really get scuidal .i am able to use logic sometimes but lot of times it fails with me. I am alone and calm now but situations changes time to time . I constantly forget things commit same mistakes again and again .speak fast fast almost other cant understand me on phone,i am really afraid of phone calls i dont pick it whenever its possible. i am now numbing my self through e novel.i am speak very less dont wanna go out of home I cant focus and really sucidal
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All those issues are directly related to low self confidence. And that could be due to your brought up and your own perception too. Do consult  a Counselor in your city and it can be resolved.
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Hi. I went through your query in detail and understand the situation you are facing. From what you have mentioned, it seems you are suffering from social anxiety disorder which is further leading to depressive symptoms. Considering the fact that you are having suicidal thoughts, you need to seek treatment at the earliest. Treatment with medications and psychotherapy in form of Cognitive Behaviour therapy can help you in coming out of your current situation and feel better.
Next Steps
Seek a psychiatric consultation and get yourself completely evaluated.
Health Tips
Talk to someone close about your problems. Sharing your thoughts helps in reducing some anxiety and feel better.
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Disclaimer : The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.