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Trust factors
Hello, I am having a good relationship with my bf since 6-7 years. Three months ago he cheated upon me n we fought for that. In fact my bf told me that he only love me n whatever he did was just a mistake. He told me to give him a chance n he really wants me. But it's hard for me to trust him again. These days he is busy in work or with his family. After this case, I fight with him alot on small things due to doubts on him. He told me that, trust me I am all yours. But due to doubts when we are together my behaviour is changed with him which can make him tensed n due to our fightings he is not happy. I think his love for me is decreased by my behaviour. I want him back n his love too. Please help me out.
Answers (5)
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Hi
I understand you dillema.. On one side you love him enough to let him go on other side these constant doubts don't let you trust and love him whole-heartedly. In the end you have to make the decision you know him best you know how sorry he is for what he did and then decide once you decide don't let any other thought bother you.
I believe you should discuss your concerns in detail with a mental health professional to gain an insight about nature of problem and ways to overcome it through psychotheraputic techniques
Consult with me or any psychologist for therapy and counseling
Connect with me through practo
Follow my Facebook page "juhi parashar -psychotherapist " for mental health issues
All the best
Seek help for early recovery
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From what you have said here it appears you have difficulty trusting your bf after finding out about his affair. Which is okay. Since you have decided to stay with him, you can try some anger management techniques. Both of you can learn some trust building exercises.
Next Steps
Please see a psychiatrist/ chat online. you can definitely be helped
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Ms. ABC (PhD)
Acupressure
11 yrs exp
Abohar
This bitter irritation will definitely reduce the sweetness and closeness of your relationship.
First forgive him by your heart for his misdeed.
Then feel and express only positive feelings to him.
All negative or conflicting feelings or expression postpone, ignore or keep silent.
Alike negative expression distance him, positive expression will bring you both more close than earlier.
This is the gradual developmental phase and learning of live.
Only love each other...May God bless you both
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Hi Mam
Thanks for seeking help here.
You are going through adjustment disorder. Don't worry with time things will fall into his place...
Your behaviour is appropriate or not that only you and your bf can decide. Cheating is something which has a wide meaning in Indian context.....from sexual relationship to just spending and talking.....
If it's not that much intense then I suggest, don't push him hard....don't spoil it ....Care him as before...
Take deep breath and practice Deep breathing exercises everytime you feel upset and want to shout...
Start Yoga. And exercise.
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Dr. Sanjay Jain
Psychiatrist
19 yrs exp
Jaipur
Hi, i understand your concern and you are the best person to judge him as you know him personally for many years and if you have decided to be with him or give him a chance again then just stick to that and stop thinking about this thing completely. Discuss with him and tell him also what going in your mind which causes frequent fights. Tell him that you are gonna be with him and don't want trust factor to come back. Once evrythng is decided just be like before and don't let past come in the way. All the best
Next Steps
Consult a psychiatrist if you still not able to come out the dilemma and don't feel stress free.
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