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Stress because of inlaws
Recently i visited my in-laws they were in the minimal interacting with me.when i came back they put blame in me I wasn't active interacting with them.we don't share good relationship.ita very casual rel.i don't feel like calling them also there is no ego battles.we are not in same page.they so t Like me so do i.but we have to be formal as this relationship go till end.how to handle it.
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Hi
Time will guide you...not everything can be planned, be confident wait for the future time
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people will always say good or bad
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Maintain your formal duties
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Thank you for sharing. Navigating strained relationships with in-laws can be emotionally draining, especially when there's minimal connection and mutual differences. It's understandable to feel conflicted â wanting to maintain basic respect and formality, yet struggling with emotional disconnect.
Since this is a long-term relationship, it may help to explore healthy boundaries, assertive communication, and emotional regulation strategies in a safe therapeutic space. Consulting a psychologist can provide you with practical tools to protect your mental peace while maintaining the necessary formalities.
You're not alone in this â with support, it's possible to handle such dynamics more calmly and confidently.
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Consult a Psychologist
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Seek counseling sessions from an expert counseling psychologist.
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I have been working as a Homeopathic Psychiatrist and Counseling psychologist for the last 17 years. You can contact me through an online appointment for further assistance
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Hi,You cannot please everyone.There are many unhelpful thoughts which we have,and can give you stress and anxiety.Learn relaxation techniques,keep boundaries,be yourself,.Fear of being judged,lack of confidence etc can cause anxiety.Consult for professional help
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Hi,
I understand, It’s completely valid to feel stressed when navigating a distant or strained relationship with your in-laws, especially when you’re blamed for a lack of interaction despite their minimal effort.
This dynamic can lead to feelings of frustration, emotional exhaustion, and confusion about how to maintain the relationship respectfully.
It’s important to remember that you’re not obligated to force closeness—politeness and minimal but mindful communication can be enough.
You can try setting emotional boundaries allows this you to protect your peace while still being respectful. Communicating through your spouse, when possible, can also ease the pressure.
Instead of expecting warmth or change, focus on maintaining formality without emotional overinvestment. You can choose to remain kind without sacrificing your emotional well-being, and if the stress becomes overwhelming, speaking to a therapist can provide support and clarity.
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Consult
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Stay respectful , , offer small kind gestures, focus on your peace, strengthen your core relationships, respond calmly, prioritize self-care, and value your effort over their response.
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Hi
You and your in-laws share a formal but emotionally distant relationship, and that’s okay. There’s no need to force closeness where it doesn’t exist. Stay polite, keep expectations low, and protect your peace. If they blame you, respond calmly and diplomatically without guilt. Focus on maintaining civility—not connection.
Take therapy, and you can connect with me on nine two six six seven two six zero six five.
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Reach out for sessions
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Hi There,
It’s okay to feel conflicted in relationships that feel more formal than warm — especially with in-laws. What you’re experiencing is not uncommon. You’re not doing anything wrong by keeping things polite and respectful while maintaining your boundaries.
Let’s work on ways to protect your peace, reduce this emotional strain, and help you respond in a way that feels authentic but not stressful. I’m here to help you navigate this with clarity and confidence.
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Sanjana Purdhani
Psychologist
2 yrs exp
Delhi
It sounds like you're feeling misunderstood and burdened by the pressure to perform politeness in a space where thereâs no emotional safety or warmth. Youâre not aloneâmany people feel torn between staying respectful and staying emotionally honest. The absence of direct conflict doesnât always mean peaceâit can still feel lonely or invalidating.
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Acknowledge the limits of this relationshipânot all bonds become close, and thatâs okay. Keep your communication cordial but emotionally protectedâdonât overextend if it doesnât feel authentic. If youâre blamed again, you can say calmly: âI understand you felt that way; I was doing my best to be respectful during the visit.â No need to over-explain. Discuss with your partner (if comfortable) so that theyâre aware and donât misinterpret the dynamics.
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Set emotional boundaries quietly. Be polite but donât seek validation from themâit frees you emotionally. Keep interactions short, predictable, and civil. Prepare for visits mentally; don't expect emotional return. Remember: Youâre allowed to preserve your peace. Formal doesnât have to mean fakeâit just means contained.
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Mr. Fr Dr John Zachariah
Counselling Psychologist
9 yrs exp
Ernakulam
Consult a counselling psychologist
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consult our psychologist
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Ms. Hema Sampath
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
Yes it is difficult to process and accept rejections..
Would suggest you to consult a psychological Counselor to understand yourself better and to overcome this issue..
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Ms. Rizwana Parvin T M
Counselling Psychologist
7 yrs exp
Coimbatore
Take up a counselling for developing a good relationship with your inlaws. Connect with me for the same.
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Ms. Sheetal Kusumbe
Counselling Psychologist
21 yrs exp
Thane
Hello,
I appreciate your honesty in maintaining the relationship with your in-laws.
This connection may come with its own challenges.
However by being your authentic self,
"Acceptance" becomes easy from both the sides.
It may take time, yet patience shall ensure that you do not need to pretend or be someone that you are not.
Genuine Care, respect, empathy can exist in a balanced manner where boundaries are established and adhered too.
I wish you successful navigation of your relationships.
You can consult for further professional guidance.
Happy Healthy Living!
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Ms. Pooja Gupta
Counselling Psychologist
8 yrs exp
Delhi
Hi,
Navigating distant or strained family relationships can be challenging, especially when interactions feel minimal and there's a lack of mutual understanding. Since you mentioned that the relationship is casual and not filled with ego battles, it might be helpful to maintain a polite and respectful demeanour without forcing interactions. Focus on being courteous when necessary, but also set healthy boundaries for yourself to avoid feeling pressured. If you prefer not to initiate contact, you can wait until they reach out, ensuring the relationship remains respectful but not overly involved. Remember, it's okay to keep things simple and neutral, especially if the relationship is expected to stay formal and there's no expectation of closeness. Prioritise your peace of mind and emotional comfort, and accept that some relationships are maintained at a basic, courteous level without deep emotional engagement.
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consult with a Psychologist
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seek help
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Ms. Farheen Moulana
Psychologist
4 yrs exp
Bangalore
Hi, it is very normal to not feel emotionally connected to your in laws, this is a complex relationship and usually takes time to build. I must appreciate your efforts to still trying to maintain a balance, and taking little steps to maintain a formal yet cordial relationship with them, plz keep up the same efforts and not force yourself into something that does not come naturally to you. I am sure that your constant showing up in this relationship will change things and you will be able to connect with them in a better way in the future.
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Ms. Smriti
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
Hi, it's okay to feel conflicted in such a situation. Not all in-law relationships turn close — sometimes they stay formal, and that's perfectly fine. Don’t blame yourself. Be respectful, keep healthy boundaries, and don’t force connection. Focus on your peace, and if needed, talk to your partner for support. You're not alone in this.
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