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Guilt and Shame
In year 2020 December I infected my mom with covid19 because I was careless and went out with friends without mask.. She got severe covid pneumonia nd was admitted.. With God's grace she recovered and came home but got post covid fibrosis in her lungs.. I dedicated my life to serving her and things were good.. Now this month in year 2022 she had a ct scan and it showed a tumor.. Biopsy said it was small cell carcinoma.. She was a former smoker in her teens.. I asked the doctor if this happened due to the fibrosis, he denied but wrote scar carcinoma in the book which clearly means cancer from scar tissue.. My one mistake has destroyed my mom's life.. It is killing me from inside that I'm the reason for her misery.. I was already guilty for her fibrosis and now this cancer.. I want to die as I have no financial aid to seek therapy even.. It is paining like it has never before.. I'm suffocating from inside in guilt.. I m cause of my mother's suffering.. pls help me 🙏
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Hi, I am sorry you are feeling this way. I am sure this is tough for you. Ot looks like the guilt is over powering you and taking over your internal emotional system. It looks like we have to create a safe space for you to be able to speak about what you are feeling and we have to also look at the root cause of this guilt which might be stored in the subconscious mind. The condition of your mother feels like a trigger to a deep seated emotion of guilt which is already stored in there. There also seems to be a fear of death which is stored in subconscious. We have to work on releasing this guilt because it seems to be eating at you like a termite. Once that is worked upon we can together sit and find a way our to understand what we can do to support your mom be better than what she is before. Your doing fine. You’re normal. Stay
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I can help you work on the guilt and help you move into a space of love and healing ❤️
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Well for the physical health doctors are there to suggest what is the best course of medicine for your mother but as for the mental health of you as a daughter as you mention that you don't have money for therapy but here on Practo we are ready to help you
The first thing that you need to begin with is letting go of the hatred feeling that it is because of you secondly you need to understand that what can be done in the present moment whatever help that you can give and provide for your mother for her treatment do it as the daughter that all you can do be in the present moment for her rather than cursing the past and being in actionable in the present.
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Seek counseling sessions immediately.
Lung scar carcinoma and lung fibrosis is different. Reasons for both the conditions is different.
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you can contact me through online appointment for further assistance
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Our mind seeks reason when we are clueless and hopeless, when we get no viable reason we start blaming ourselves or others eventually feel guilty and hurt ourselves more.past cannot be changed but taking right actions in present can surely change future.
Try muscle relaxation and deep breathing for sometime.try holding your self tight and relaxing systematically to differentiate between your stressed muscle state and relax states probably this will help.
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if time permits read some self help books.
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Hi
You are a strong and caring person. Avoid feeling guilty. You are taking good care of your mother. You have to feel good about yourself. Identify your positive qualities and practice self-care and self-compassion.
You will require counselling sessions. Do take care of yourself
Next Steps
Consult a psychologist
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Contact me for counselling session. Along with counselling I can suggest natural foods to calm the mind.
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Hi, Blaming yourself and feeling guilty is very common when people are in stress . Living in the past cannot change the present.Acccept the situation and look after your mother instead of blaming yourself.Focus on your strengths instead of your weakness.Forgive yourself and accept the reality.Talk to your friends and loved ones when you feel sad and start thinking about death.Smoking can be the reason for lung cancer.
Health Tips
Yoga and meditation
Deep breathing exercises
progressive muscles relaxation
Healthy lifestyles like a healthy diet, sleep and regular exercise .
Avoid caffeine and alcohol
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Mr. Gunjan Maithil
Psychologist
13 yrs exp
Bangalore
Hi... During this pandemic many people have lost their loved ones and a lot of them also suffer from one or the other form of guilt associated with their loss. The nature of this virus is such it is going to infect everyone sooner or later. The only difference now is that most people are fully vaccinated so the effects of this virus is minimal. Your mother was vulnerable to this virus more compared to you maybe because of her age or maybe because of some precondition, but the fact is that she was vulnerable and her body was supposed to respond in this manner when she gets infected by this virus. You were only a medium. No one was consciously carrying the virus to infect other people. It was a wrong narrative spread by the media/govt. bodies while trying to desperately delay its spread till the time people get vaccinated.
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Consult a Psychologist.
CBT along with Interpersonal Guidance & Counselling is required.
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Mr. Gunjan Maithil
Senior Psychologist
Cell: nine six seven one three zero three one three four
Website: https://gunjanmaithil.wixsite.com/therapy
App: http://wix.to/fechb08?ref=cl
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Ms. Smriti
Counselling Psychologist
15 yrs exp
Bangalore
Get comfortable. You can lie on your back in bed or on the floor with a pillow under your head and knees. ...
Breathe in through your nose. Let your belly fill with air.
Breathe out through your nose.
Place one hand on your belly. ...
As you breathe in, feel your belly rise. ...
Take three more full, deep breaths.
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counseling
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connect
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Ms. Jesin John
Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Hyderabad
You can’t mend every situation, and some mistakes might cost you a treasured relationship or close friend. Guilt combined with sadness over someone or something you’ve lost often feels impossible to escape.
Looking back and ruminating on your memories/past deeds won’t fix what happened.Lets accept what has happened ,learn to forgive ourselves and see how best we can support our loved ones in their trivial situations.
Health Tips
Self-compassion exercise that can be helpful when working with guilty feelings,wherein you can reframe negative self-talk instead of reminding yourself about your grave mistake and how bad it is by simply agreeing to it.
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