Extreme sadness. Than do suggest!

Sad tierd dizzy confused angry Dipressed suicidal anxious. I don't know what the hell I am going through, for past few months. but one thing is happening. I.e. m loosing control. It seems as if smallest issues can trigger my self-anger, I can't feel anything at all I can do is try to pretend that I'm okay. Maybe that's why I ignore meeting a lot of people. I really can't properly remember roads n things which I read or heard. I can't focus properly it is like living in the jail of negativity. My father is facing financial issues and instead of being mature I act foolishly and it made me regret a lot. I sometimes feel hatred towards everyone It's like I don't wanna live but I can't kill myself... ( FYI i am a student who used to be a kind of schooler n once i wrote an article about power of Positivity) I badly wanna come out of these misory of sadness. I recently started working out but it seems as if it made my mood worse.please help. If i need some medicines than do suggest