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Trust issues
Hi, I'm dating a guy since 1 nd hlf nd I really luv him. we've decided 2 b 2gthr fr d rest of our lives. We're vry compatible nd we enjoy evry bit of time whn we're togthr. Sex is grt.
But there are prblms which come in btwn us whenever we talk anything related sex. I've been with a few guys in the past befre him. On the othr hand my bf was a virgin whn he met me. So basically whatever he has done wid me is his 1st time. But he's nt able to get ovr my past. I had sexual relation with a guy just a week bfre we strted gng out and he knows it. aftr tht while we were gng out i ws talking to another guy we mde out twice. my bf dint knw abt him. Bt then I stopped evrythng. Recently he read all the chats and it crushed him. Already he was nt accepting my past sexual relatns. Now He has lost it. He loves me a lot. i realy wnt 2 b wid him. he wants me too. I'm really worried abt him as he's vry emotional and i cnt see him this way. wht shld I do? how can i possibly nt lose him!? plz help.
Answers (3)
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There is nothing which can't be worked out through good communication. Since you both enjoy being together and share interests, time is needed to build up trust. You may both benefit from counselling. If you can stick it out during this phase you may find that your relationship becomes stronger. the emotional and sexual relationship you have developed with him is what he needs help with to focus on.
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Ms. Hema Sampath
Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
I think, be however you need to be, according to him, if you do not want to loose him.
It's about building the trust in him against your past .
Also I feel there is something in you about which you are Happy!
May be because of that could have had many relationships?!
I would appreciate if you could share those feelings gs and emotions to so eine very neutral and also who could be giving you some clarity about you and ur future.
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Dr. Priyadarshani Jain
Psychiatrist
19 yrs exp
Mumbai
Hi, All relationships need good sex, communication money and trust. People balance all this to get the best out of a relationship. Not necessary the problem is with your bf only. You are getting affected too. It's obvious because you both love and need each other. Trust is build up over time. It's not a 1 day or 1 event foundation work. It requires efforts from both sides, here as I can see little more from your side.
Next Steps
Kindly meet a psychiatrist or a counsellor as a couple to sort out the issues together.
Health Tips
Be empathetic towards your bf. And kindly get help at the correct moment before things worsen.
Regards,
Dr. Priyadarshani Jain
Mumbai
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Disclaimer : The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.