I need a solution to my problem.

Hi I'm 32 yrs old married and working in a private company. . I lost my mom in my small age n my husband passed away 2 yrs back.. I always have the fear of losing my loved ones.. I feel so sad n lonely dese days n gtng irritated for small things also.. can't control my anger n unable to focus on anything.. I lost my interest in my day to day activities also and hvng loss of appetite n disturbed slp during the nite.. I don't understand the purpose of this life and at times I don't feel like surviving.. I m very absent minded dese days.. not sure what's the problem and whether it's curable. . I too feel like leading a happy life but my mind is not letting me.. I always think n feel negative. . Not sure why..