Download FREE Practo app
Get ₹200 HealthCash
Couple relationship problem
Hi doc, me and my wife has frequent fight. we are not agree on same point. i feel she is not mature and she think i am rude & not respecting her.
whenever we had fight i just stop talking becase i dont want argue, and i get irritate.
due to this i am loosing interest on her and not physically attracted towards her.
please asvice how i can manage the things with my wife, i want healthy relationship with her. basically i expect below things from my wife:
- care my parents like she do our child
- tasty food by wifes hand
- good sex (not vanilla only) means enjoy in bed as well.
i am not getting anything from above these from my wife which makes me unhappy with her.
and with this i dont fullfill her requirement as well. so we had more fight.
when i tried to talk her but she is immature and unable to understand.
please help how can i explain my feeling to her, as she is not understand . please advice how can i improve my relation with my wife.
Answers (9)
Get your queries answered instantly with Care AI FREE
20000+ health queries resolved in last month
Hi
Next Steps
relationship therapy
Health Tips
hi
Answered
Flag this answer
Let others know if this answer was helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Didn't find the answer you are looking for?
Talk to experienced doctor online and get your health questions answered in just 5 minutes.
+168
Kindly consult psychotherapist
Answered
Flag this answer
Let others know if this answer was helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Hi
It sounds like you and your wife have different expectations from the marriage, which is causing frequent conflicts and emotional distance. Your frustration and her feeling of disrespect are signs that both of you are not feeling heard or valued in the relationship. Avoiding arguments by stopping communication may temporarily prevent fights, but in the long run, it creates more emotional distance and resentment.
To rebuild understanding and intimacy, you both need to work on effective communication and mutual compromise. Instead of focusing on what she is not doing, try expressing your needs in a non-blaming, open manner. For example, instead of saying “You don’t care for my parents,” say “It would mean a lot to me if you showed warmth towards my parents, just like you do with our child.” Similarly, discuss intimacy issues openly—make sure both of you feel comfortable and emotionally connected, as physical attraction often comes from emotional closeness.
Since she finds it difficult to understand your perspective, a marriage counselor can help mediate these discussions and create a healthy balance in your expectations. If you want to take online therapy sessions, connect with me on nine two six six seven two six zero six five. Therapy can help both of you rebuild trust, improve communication, and strengthen your marriage.
Answered
Flag this answer
Let others know if this answer was helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Hi,
Improving your relationship with your wife will require open communication, empathy, and a willingness to understand each otherâs perspectives. Start by choosing a calm moment to discuss your feelings without placing blame; use "I" statements to express how her actions affect you. For example, say âI feel unhappy when there is a lack of affection or supportâ instead of critiquing her behavior directly. Encourage her to share her feelings as well, fostering a two-way dialogue. Additionally, consider proposing a âdate nightâ to reconnect and enjoy each otherâs company without the stress of daily life. Engaging in activities you both enjoy can help rebuild intimacy. It might also be beneficial to attend couples counseling, where a neutral party can help facilitate discussions. Approach this process with patience and a genuine desire to understand each otherâs needs, as it will take time to improve your relationship.
Next Steps
consult with a Psychologist
Health Tips
seek help
Answered
Flag this answer
Let others know if this answer was helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Hi
It might be difficult at times to understand and expect from the relationship. For better understanding what and where to work on your relationship you can opt for couple counselling
Answered
Flag this answer
1/1 people found this helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Ms. Hema Sampath
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
Would suggest both of you to consult /Visit a Marriage Counselor to understand yourself better and to understand each other better..
Health Tips
For more details you can reach me.
Answered
Flag this answer
Let others know if this answer was helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Ms. Neha Sachdev
Psychologist
11 yrs exp
Delhi
Hi
Couples have such differences. Any two people involved in a relationship or friendship will have different opinions. It’s is necessary to listen and respect each other’s opinion.
Not talking to her will lead to piled up issues which would occur again and again during the arguments.
She too may be going through emotional distress and expects you to respect her opinions and expectations. Marriage is all about fulfilling each other expectations.
Have an open communication with her in a peace time. Be open to her thoughts and feelings. It can’t be done only one way. If you want to be listened, you would have to initiate to listen to her first.
Discuss your opinions rather than accusing each other.
Physical intimacy is again very important. Ask her about her fantasies, and she too will reciprocate the same way.
If you wanted to be treated a certain way, it’s you who has to take the first step. Eg- if you want her to take care of your parents, you would have to initiate to take care of her family. This way she would acknowledge your efforts and will do the same.
Accusation and saying that”you don’t do it” will only make her defensive and find more negatives in you. That’s like playing tit for tat and you guys will land up hating each other more.
Next Steps
Couples therapy is needed.
Consult to talk about it.
Happy to help
Answered
Flag this answer
Let others know if this answer was helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Sanjana Purdhani
Psychologist
2 yrs exp
Delhi
It sounds like you and your wife are experiencing a cycle of unmet expectations, frustration, and emotional distance. Relationships thrive on communication, mutual understanding, and emotional connection, and itâs good that you want to improve things rather than give up.
Next Steps
Shift from Expectation to Conversation, Communication Without Blame, Emotional Connection Before Physical Intimacy, Find a Middle Ground for Expectations
Health Tips
If repeated efforts arenât working, a therapist can help both of you communicate and understand each other better. If she resists therapy, start with self-reflection on how you can lead by example in improving your relationship.
Answered
Flag this answer
1/1 people found this helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Ms. Smriti
Counselling Psychologist
18 yrs exp
Bangalore
Connect for couple counseling
Next Steps
consult
Health Tips
counseling
Answered
Flag this answer
1/1 people found this helpful
Was this answer helpful?
YES
NO
Articles you may like
Disclaimer : The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.
The question asked on this page is a free question. You can ask a free health question by downloading the Practo app.
Articles you may like
Tell us what's troubling you
Tell us what's troubling you
Disclaimer : The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.