Coming off the use of antidepressants.

I have been using anti depressants since 10 months now. Although when I started realizing that I am suffering from problems like anxiety, breathing problems, nervousness and top of all difficulty while interacting with others or during office meetings, I was never sure i am suffering from some kind of depression or not. I started taking desvenlafexanie and vilazodone hydrochloride. and along with them melzap and pronolol. But while i was having medium to full time dose of these medicines in last 10 12 months my life was completely ruined. I have been struggling each day with the side effects of these medicines. The better part was I was able to perform normally at office and got some portion of my social life back. But after 10 months now that I realize that I am quite dependent on them i am not able to move out. Going through the withdrawal symptoms & some part of initial problems are back. Both ways its hell. And i am confused whther my intitial problem was even depression or not