It seems you have had bad experiences with people who you considered to be close to you and you're facing some difficulty coping up with the social pressures of life. But please tell your family/ close friends about your suicidal thoughts, don't take any impulsive decisions and consult a psychiatrist asap. You may be suffering from clinical depression which can be treated.
Next Steps
Consult a psychiatrist asap.
Health Tips
Whatever you are feeling is all a phase, this will pass. It's not worth ending your life.