Hello
Good morning.
I read ur description and understood ur concern. You need to understand about few things. I can few conclusion from ur situation.
1. Lonliness
2. Sensitive Personality.
3. Mood disturbances.
4. Sleep problems.
5. Easy fatiguebility.
6. Sucidal / death ideas.
7. Relationship discord.
8. Depending & expecting from others.
All the above features are indicative of Thought,Mood, emotion & behaviour disturbances.
Next Steps
Consult a Psychiatrist or Neuropsychiatrist of ur choice , discuss everything psychosocial stressors in details .
Health Tips
Avoid to be implusive in showing emotions and behavior.
Don't consume any Sleeping pills without supervision of Psychiatrist.
Try to meditate for 20 mins daily.
Take a balanced diet.
** Have a safe peaceful day **.