Spontenous ejaculation or Masturbation.

I am a married man of 60 years. I am a father of five children. From my youth days I was addicted to watching porn movies.  Watching hot bed scenes in porn movies sometimes made me ejaculate. Although I didn't want to ejaculate. For the last 40 years I was addicted to watching porn movies.  I used to watch porn once  a month and I would ejaculate.  And now I have stopped watching porn movies for the past three years. Now I suspect that I may have masturbated while watching porn movies.  Although, I never used to shake my penis with my hands.  Still used to ejaculate automatically even though I didn't want to ejaculate. Now I'm afraid I've done the ejaculatory thing for 40 years.  I may have masturbated. May I not suffer from mental illness due to this masturbation. I have frequent thoughts and suspicions in my mind that I have masturbated after watching pornographic movies. I will go crazy.