Need a Physiologist. To do next in life.

I am really confuse about myself.what to do next in life. Sometime i think of joining a job and sometime i think to start a business..but whatever I opt for I am not able to focus. I want to do but I don't know why I am not doing it. Due to that suicidal thoughts occur and i feel headache whole day. I want to stay alone but loneliness is killing me. I am over thinking about everything and feeling as everybody in my home is talking about me. Feeling confused. My family point out a little thing that I do. If m sitting idle they'll taunt why you are sitting like this. If I am doing whatever they'll ask. I don't want to answer. I just feel like nobody loves me. I live with my family with my 2 brothers. They encourage me for things but the more they say i hate it and feel as m not capable thats why they are saying. Or I don't know . Please help me.