Marriage: anger mgmt & communication.

My husband and I have major arguments which often turn into rage for my husband. he ends up hitting himself in rage or hitting me. he gets angry and often mentions that my communication style & habit of nagging, finding faults in him leads to his stress. he also has sleeping problems - doesn't sleep in the night & mostly sleeps through the day that affects his work life terribly. he has a work from home job. getting him to make small or major changes, any, is a huge ask and  always end in these fights or him abusing / smashing doors etc. am not sure how to best mitigate / approach because all my communication strategies and efforts have failed. the marriage is emotionally draining - both for him and I. any suggestions will be helpful. He has anger management issues.. ends up yelling, abusing quickly. Also I have often heard him feel like a victim saying no one is there to appreciate him enough and that he is stressed. Any help will be much much appreciated.