Feelings of sadness, emptiness, numbness

I've been told two years ago that I was probably depressed and I've always wanted to do something about it since then but never came around doing it until I knew I was sure but now I realize that I probably am because I somehow everyday get these moments where I feel sad and numb and I've also been binge eating but loosing weight. I've looked up the symptoms and I feel like I have some of them. It has been a problem and now I want to know for sure. I also am really shy, very anxious and often get panic attacks where I mostly just start sweating but feeling cold and breathing rapidly. I've also been having suicidal thought for two years and been self-harming but not very addicted, just once in a while but I think it's kind of a problem. I've also doubted I had bipolar disorder but I dont think so...