Depression. Professional help. pls help.

There are different stages of grieving process to any human being, which your spouse is going through. You can't control her going through such grieving process. Denial is often the first stage, where a person cannot accept the loss of their loved ones, it is quite obvious to say "It is not happened". This is a defensive mechanism. As reality sets in, she could have been facing the pain of loss that made her feel frustrated and helpless. She must be in this stage, that is making her to blame herself and others as cause of her father's death. Also she must be angry on her father who left her alone (despite all of you being with her). One can go depressed, when they dwell on what could have been done to save or prevent the loved one from dying. There will be lots of talks such as, "I could have done that to save", "you all could have done this" etc. This is quite normal. She has to reach the final stage of "grieving process which is "Acceptance", where she will surely accept the reality and she feels that her father's death is inevitable and it couldn't have been changed or stopped. Now the need of the hour is give her soothing comfort, a leaning shoulder to cry on, all in the family co-operate etc. As a spouse, you have more responsibilities to execute. Give her a change of place/environment, divert her attention to something productive that she likes to do. Convince her to go for a professional help, both of you consult a Counselor in your city.