Hello Friend, Good that you are seeking a help. When you are emotions take control of your mind, you will see only negativity. Don't get dragged by those thoughts. When you are already in the midst of cloud, you can see things around you clearly. In such suitations, it's better to ask for help.
Take a counseling support to assess your self first. You will get a different perspective of your problem and suitable solutions to overcome the same.
Next Steps
Feel free to reach out to me online through Practo for further detailed evaluation and suitable solutions that you can follow immediately to overcome negativity.