I understand your situation. You seem to be suffering from obsessive symptoms. More clarity is needed regarding your problem to decide on the severity of your condition. Don't worry it is not your fault, it is the hormonal fluctuations in your body which is taking a toll on your mental health. It is easily manageable with appropriate treatment, so that dysfunction due to the same can be reduced and your quality of life will improve. However these medications will not be available to you over the counter, you need to discuss with a psychiatrist about the same. I would also be more than happy to help you with that if you are looking for online assistance or second opinion. Some counselling sessions along with medical help might be useful for you. Discussions will be held confidential. You can directly consult with me through Practo as needed. Online chat consultation is available.