Hello Friend, Good that you are seeking a help. I can understand your suitation. From your narration, I can see you are already inching towards your dream of marriaging your loved one. Things are slowly turning positive. Yes, there may be few more hurdles to cross..be confident. When your mind in disturbed, don't take any hasty decisions.
What you need now is a strength to handle the emotional battle for few more yards . Suggest you to take a counseling support to figure out the reason for your emotional weakness and try a suitable solution to overcome that. Surely you will be able to succeed.
Next Steps
Take a counseling support locally or feel free to reach out to me online through Practo app chat for further evaluation and counseling recommendations.