You seem to be going through a tough time. When you are trying to resolve a problem, it's important that your boyfriend is also in the mood to hear you out. Talking without blaming him, might stop him from blaming you, instead, say what you observed and what it meant to you.
Next Steps
Please see a counselling psychologist for an evaluation and further course of action.
Health Tips
Assertive communication skill will help you to resolve conflicts easily.