Hello,
Please don’t think of yourself as crazy or idiotic for having such feelings. It is not abnormal for someone to experience mood swings. However, in order to fully understand your problems and the extent to which it troubles you, it would be preferential for you to visit a psychologist. You can also start by talking to a close friend or family member to see if that helps alleviate some of the symptoms.
Next Steps
Schedule an appointment with a psychologist for a more detailed discussion of your life and the problems you are facing. Also to rule out if your mood swings are clinically significant.
Health Tips
You can try doing some relaxation techniques or yoga at home, in order to help you focused and balanced.