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Sexual orientation

Since my adolescent age, I never had interest in males. But instead I feel so into girls. I had some chances, where i did test myself. Yet, I could not feel the attraction towards a guy as I feel for a girl. Since then I knew that this is not a acceptable behavior in India. I didn't want to be a specimen for bad character. Thus I started controlling myself and my mindset, but all I could achieve was nothing. Now, my parents are compelling me to get married.But its a nightmare to me. Biologically I can consummate my marriage,but then it will be nothing but a forced physical relationship. I cannot think even how dreadful it would be for me. I have told my parents many times that I dont want to get mmarried but now their reaction towards this has become furious.Whole of my family is accusing me for depletion of my parent's health. What should I do? How should i make them understand?
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Doctor Answers (2) on Sexual orientation

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Answered
Hello. I can see that while you care for your parents, helping them understand your sexual orientation is extremely important right now, considering both the pressures for marriage as well as the blame for their ill health. This news might be difficult for them to process. A family therapist/ counsellor might help you break the news and handle the consequences in a safe atmosphere.
Next Steps
You could also reach out to anyone in your current family/ friend circle who you think would be able to help you in asserting your viewpoint to your parents.You could reach out to a Counselling psychologist who will be able to help you through this. There are also a couple of helplines/ organisations in Chennai (ICWO, SAATHI, Orinam) that might be able to help ease this process for you. Wishing you the best.
Health Tips
Breaking the news in a planned way- slowly but affirmatively will help you. Be cognizant of your support system for emotional and physical safety.
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Dr. Satish Ramaiah Bangalore | Addiction Psychiatrist
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Hi

I understand the situation is not easy within the context of normal expectations, culture etc. You need to be mindful that this is never going to be easy & take steps to discuss with your parents. Information sharing should be slow, steady & allowing them to express their emotions / concerns (address it too). This is the process to allow them to come to terms. Please acknowledge their feelings all through. Seek a therapist or professional help if needed to assist you with this.

Hope it is helpful. Best wishes

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