Marriage counselling. Bitter history.

Me and my wife are married for 3 years and going through rough time. It has become impossible to continue this relationship for both. We have spoke about divorce also few times. We choose each other because our liking and passions are similar our philosophy of overall life too is similar. We are simple people. But due to drastic mismatch in expectations and what we get in return we started having differences and now everything has gone out of control. But we care for each other and we are reluctant to put our families through divorce. So we want to know is it possible to still coexist in this marriage without loosing our identities and our passion for life (which is at minimum right now, our state of mind is closer to being depressed right now) and where we can be happy despite the differences and bitter history.