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I m 30 yrs old married for 1 year and my wife is 25 years old. We are having a frequent trouble in our life may be due to difference of opinion with her . She always plays the victim and does not really tries to understand others point , no matter how hard and politely you try to make her understand. After listening to everything , only thing she says tat " I am bad is all i can gather from what all you are saying ". She often runs to her maternal home after the argument heats up , that too so often as 2 months. This has happened 4 times so far since marriage. And after spending a week or so to her maternal home , she often calls me and complains abt me being egoistic and arrogant for not calling her in the while she was there, She does not think from others point of view , even despite taking her attention to other's point of view , She only says whats is going on in her mind, and sometimes i really dint understand what is going inside her mind and really don't find any relation.....
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Relationship issues are often sensitive as it involves emotions, expectations, individual perceptions, views, values, opinions and beliefs. Although most couples would have the same fundamental differences in marriage, some end up happily married and some don't. Marital issues usually stems from failure to appreciate individual differences. While you become conscious and mindful of your own emotions, make sure that your wife's perceptions and views are appreciated. It does not mean you agree for everything. Only when an individual feels appreciated they are likely to listen to others. Take things objectively and as a matter of fact. Allow and respect the differences in perceptions. Let her feel that you completely understand her world and request her to understand your world. Stay calm. Don't get desperate or show any negative emotions or judgements about others behavior. Remember, what perceive is actually the truth for them. We got to start off by appreciating this. You both can choose to get professional help for couple therapy if problem persists. Best wishes
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Disclaimer : The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.