I feel that your present condition needs to be attended to with medication, if prescribed, by a psychiatrist. Many people think going to a psychiatrist is not very desirable, which is not true. It is not because yours is a serious condition, but because medication, mostly short term, is very likely to bring your mental condition to a level at which you will yourself, may be with the help of a psychologist, be able to handle it well, without probably any further medication. In your case, I do notice that you do not have a favourable family condition and also you do not have many friends. These may be contributing factors to your current state of mind. These too necessitate urgent attention towards improving it in other available ways like with the help of a psychologist or psychiatrist.
Before all these, do visit your family physician and check out if your physical health is proper.
Next Steps
Take help from mental health professionals like a psychiatrist and / or a psychologist.