Hello.
Losing someone we care about can be the most painful thing in life, more so when we love that person very much. It must be extremely difficult for you right now, I want you to know as of now you do not need to control your emotions. Allow yourself to be. More you try to control it, more it will get out of hand. It is important that you talk about it and share the memories of your father with someone you care about and love.
Meeting a counselor can help you to talk about these feelings and understand it better. You can be yourself and talk about and share what you want to. A counselor can empathize with you and help you to feel understood. I appreciate the effort you took now to come out and talk about it.
Next Steps
Share the memories of your father with someone you are care and love. As much as you are okay talk about how you feel.
Health Tips
If you can meet a counselor to talk about the same. This will help you to feel better.