Hello,
I am able to understand what you are going through.
Marriage is a major life event and has a lot of positive and negative effects on individuals.
As you described, you are angry, sad and dissatisfied with the way your husband and mother in law are treating you, despite you trying hard to get along well.
However, the issue is not who is right or wrong, the issue is about compromising to some extent from both the sides, which is not happening in your family.
Next Steps
You need to relax and try to have a healthy discussion with your husband and in laws and if you have tried and failed, kindly consult a psychiatrist. A family therapy or intervention is needed.
also, as you are unable to control your emotions and even having self harm thoughts, you may require some medicines to relax you for sometime.