Hello Friend, Good that you are seeking a help here. I can understand your suitation situation. Surely you can find a ways to keep your life happy in spite of such hardship.
Better take a counseling guidance to express your feelings, emotions and concerns. I am sure you will be able to see a different prepective about yourself and suitable suggest to handle your family better.
Next Steps
Don't hesitate to consult a Psychologist directly or online. Feel free to reach out to me online through Practo app chat for further evaluation and recommendation. Be positive. You will be alright soon.