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Wife going through Issues
Hi ,
me and my wife are separated for the last 2 years.
The reason she tells me is that she feels I love my parents and my sister too much and don't care for her. She had issues 10 years ago,we are 11 years married now and we have 2 kids.
When she got married she had issues with her parents .She doesn't hv any friend inbthe past .
Recently she made a gud friend , I waa going to file a divorce yesterday and on her friends advice she has accepted to meet a clinical psychologist .
I feel she has deep rooted issues as a child but the manifestations of the same comes in multiple forms .
Request to please help and guide the right person or clinic for the same.She has suicidal thoughts but she has too much ego and doesn't open up.We went through marriage counselling but it never helped her since it was about us.Its about her and if through counselling she feels better about herself I will be happy.
Answers (6)
Hi first make your wife to fix appointment and to sort out childhood suppressed things which disturbs her quality of life. She needs therapy for several sessions to deal with emotional issues. After making her to solve confusions and then going for couple counselling will be helpful to sort out ur misunderstanding and to find harmony in ur marital life.
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Yes, as you rightly mentioned she needs to heal her past. Because past experiences can show up in her behavior. In a marriage it is not about the wife or the husband it is the relationship which needs counseling. When relationship is tweaked a little it could come back to track. There two people, two families and two belief systems. When midway is arrived by both the partners, relationship improves for good!
Next Steps
Please help your wife to seek help from a professional psychologist like me so that she can work on her past.
Health Tips
Marriage is about agreeing to disagree. Accepting your partner giving her the space to be herself and vice versa!
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She named a promising hope, that, she can be happy with you. Both sides ego issues are noticed.
Both need to undergo, integrated approach for physical n mental health.
This can be resolved surely but dont expect immediately. If atleast you have patience , this can solve in three months.
For every one , we can assure promising results, you need to try our suggestions, not jump into conclusion. Life is there to all who worries about life not about people
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Good to know that you still want to keep this alive..
One very important point not mention by you is about your wife's parents..
Are they supportive or against you.??
If supportive talk to them, bring it to them in details.. If not tough for you..
If you both get seperated for any reason, your 2 kids are the main going to be affected.. In many ways..
Make your wife realise that..
Also ask her what she wants most other than family and why??
Any unfulfilled dreams like job or anything..
Only if I talk once I can understand and solve problems quickly.
Next Steps
I can help you both.. contact me for personal in depth sessions.. and do healing sessions also if needed..
good luck..
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Thanks for reaching out for help. From your history, it seems there have been various attempts to go for counselling and they have not been fully successful. I would encourage you to try once again to take appointment with a counselling psychologist.
Next Steps
If you feel your spouse is not opening up, you can approach a counselling psychologist who can help her be more forthcoming in her discussions. It is only after she is comfortable talking about herself can you go into couples counselling. I would suggest taking online appointment with someone like me who can also use NLP and Hypnotherapy to help her deal with childhood problems, if they are present.
Health Tips
Your wife and yourself need to be first on the same page regarding taking psychological help and working out your issues. Rushing into divorce proceedings might not be the ideal step now. Do strive to get her to co operate for in depth online counselling sessions with me or any therapist if your choice. It would definitely be beneficial.
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