Please consult a Psychologist  immediately. I.know how difficult  it is to survive in this world. If you can understand and can learn to handle the people and situations,  I  think you have all the reasons to live I  this world with ur own terms.

Hello there..... Take steps to control stress, to increase your resilience and boost your self-esteem. Reach out to family and friends, especially in times of crisis, to help you weather rough spells. Get treatment at the earliest sign of a problem to help prevent depression from worsening. Consider getting long-term maintenance treatment to help preven,t a relapse of symptoms..... Consult Psychiatrist....