I cannot sleep. Whole night I stay awake because of fear that something will happen to me and darkness and feeling of being alone kills me. I suffer from panic attacks where I feel like my whole body is numb, I feel like someone is injecting needles on my body, I start losing myself and then I break down and cry out loud. As the night approaches, I start having wrong thoughts about killing myself. I had done self harm many times and have this suicidal feeling always. It's like I just cry and cry and start feeling depressed all of a sudden which leads to excessive crying.