I'm sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult situation. Dealing with complex family dynamics can be challenging. Here are some steps you might consider taking to address your concerns:
Communication: Open and honest communication is key. Try to have a calm and respectful conversation with your husband about your feelings. Use "I" statements to express how his actions and his mother's behavior make you feel. For example, say, "I feel hurt when I am scolded in front of others, and it affects our relationship."
Set Boundaries: Discuss and establish clear boundaries with your husband about how you both should handle conflicts involving his mother. Agree on how you both can support each other and protect your relationship from external influences.
Counseling: Consider seeking couples counseling. A therapist can facilitate communication and help both of you understand each other's perspectives. They can also provide guidance on how to handle difficult family situations.
Provide Evidence: Since you have recordings that prove your point, calmly share this evidence with your husband. Be prepared for the conversation, stay calm, and present the recordings as a way to illustrate your concerns, not to attack his mother.
Empathy: Try to understand your husband's perspective and his relationship with his mother. Empathizing with his feelings can create a more open environment for discussion. Encourage him to see things from your point of view as well.
Next Steps
Remember, every situation is unique, and it might be helpful to consult a professional therapist who can provide personalized guidance tailored to your specific circumstances.
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