I have always been a smart chap and intelligent. During college i smoked a lot of marijuana and had serious problems like paranoia and behvioural problems. For a while i had suicidal tendencies as i couldnt go back to my normal self. Somehow after 4-5 years of smoking i gave up. Now i dont smoke and completely quit its been few years now because if i do i get very disoriented. But i always was a heavy drinker and still drink. I lost my girlfriend because of it. Now i have developed another serious problem i cant focus properly. If there are two ppl sitting together and if i talk to one than i feel like im becoming cock eyed cuz i cant focus on one person. Lately im having problems pronouncing a few words like "technology" and pls keep in mind i was a brilliant i achieved 80+marks in english and also i am a rap artist. Im very confused and depressed and get irritated and im afraid that people think im abnormal cuz of my behavioural problems . Please help