It sounds like you're experiencing a complex combination of challenges, including lack of confidence, difficulty in interviews, trouble sustaining focus, feelings of overwhelm, financial strain, and emotional distress. The shifting emotions you described during laughter, where it transitions into sadness and thoughts of self-harm, could indicate underlying mental health issues such as depression and anxiety.
Based on your description, it's possible that you may be experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety, which can manifest as feelings of hopelessness, difficulty concentrating, and mood fluctuations. It's important to seek professional evaluation and support to address these concerns and develop a plan for managing your mental health effectively.
Next Steps
Seeking support from a mental health professional, such as a therapist or counselor, is crucial in addressing these concerns and developing coping strategies. Therapy can provide a safe and supportive space to explore your thoughts and emotions, learn effective stress management techniques, and develop a plan to address your challenges and improve your overall well-being. You may reach out to me if you'd like.
Health Tips
In addition to therapy, consider reaching out to career counseling services for guidance in navigating your job search and building confidence in interviews. Breaking tasks into smaller, manageable steps can help reduce overwhelm, and setting realistic goals can foster a sense of accomplishment. Practice self-compassion and remind yourself that it's okay to ask for help and take things one step at a time.