It is difficult to deal with such issues on your own. The concerns expressed by you respond best to a combination of medication and psychotherapy. Do not stop psychiatric medication on your own. It might lead to more difficulties. The best way is to consult your psychiatrist and voice your concerns about medication. They can allay your fears and sort your complaints. Also, look for a cognitive behavioral therapist. CBT is the most effective psychotherapy and works wonderfully for the kind of problems you are experiencing. Wishing you better health in future!

It seems like you are going through a lot. I agree medication is not the only solution but it does help reduce severity of symptoms while you work with a therapist and make other lifestyle changes that can be transformative. It also seems like there needs to be a clarity with regards to diagnosis . Please reach out to a place where therapists and psychiatrists work together so you can get a more integrative model of care.