Hello Friend, Good that you are seeking a help here. Don't hold on negative emotions within you. When you are mentally disturbed, don't take any hasty decisions. Better to ventilate your emotions, feelings and concerns to someone who care like friends or family members. If hesitate to speak to them, then take a professional counselling support to assess your suitation and get recommendations. You can find a suitable solution in such open discussion..
Next Steps
Feel free to reach out to me online for further evaluation and recommendation.