Thank you for your question. It is not necessary to bleed when you first have sex. Virginity has nothing to do with bleeding nor pain or hymen being intact. In young girls hymen can be damaged by sports or cycling or fingers. Some hymen can be flexible and do not bleed. Other times it can be rigid and friable and bleed easily several times with intercourse. You can share this information with your partner. Trust is very important in any relationship and it is difficult if someone cannot or will not trust you or believe what you say. I do hope you are able to convince him. Best wishes