I feel scared and irritated both when i step out in public places. Feels mix of both. Recently lost mom, someone said i have adjustment disorder n borderline depression. But I feel somethings not right. I prefer sitting in dark room with no lights. Even sunlight bothers me. Every day passed makes me feel like a step closer to mom as i was responsible for pushing her to die post signing DNR sheet. As it turns dark at night, it increases. I shiver, don't feel like eating, get fever, stomach gets upset, and whole body aches, every possible joint n back. I see mumma around and in dreams but she doesn't talk to me. May because i killed her. What's this? Can anyone explain?