Hello ma'ma.
Relax, don't worry.
The problem you are suffering from is known as Vaginismus.
Vaginismus is a condition which can be caused by physical stressors, emotional stressors, or both. It can become anticipatory, so that it happens because the person expects it to happen.
You can use Vaseline jelly or coconut oil for lubricant.
Next Steps
For further information consult me directly.