Dear, to understand your complaints you need know that alcohol is CNS suppressant. It means that if a person is drinking a considerable amount of alcohol over a long duration of time the nervous system activity of that that person will be suppressed due to this. The sadness you are feeling is due to this. I do understand life is very tricky these days, but drinking is not the solution for it. You need immediate help.
Next Steps
please visit a psychotherapost for intense psychotherapy
visit a psychiatrist for rehabilitation.
Health Tips
you can come over this... I believe that you can ! all the best !!