Hello Friend, Good that you are seeking a help here. I can understand your suitation. You need to first ventilate your emotions to someone who cares you like close friends or a family member.Also you need to openly speak to  your husband about your concern and expectations. Sometimes men doesn't understand your feelings in such suitations and don't give up because of that ignorance. May be you need to take a guidance of counseling support. That should help in reducing your emotional stress and get you confidence to face your delivery and post delivery problems. Better go for online counseling considering your suitation. Feel free to reach out to me online for further evaluation and recommendation.